30 Days of Truth: A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)

Dear Jewel,
You and your music have gotten me through some tough ass days.  When I think about a band or artist who has helped me get through tough times, I think about when my toughest times were. I hit rock bottom when my first husband and I separated, and subesquently, I lived as a single mom for four years in my mom's house (1994-1998).  I had a baby girl (same birthday as you!), and I lived in my mom's basement in Springfield, Virginia (a DC suburb) while I put my life back together..  A long time fan of the DC music scene, I remember when you first played at the 9:30 Club.  Pieces of You was released in 1995, and Who Will Save Your Soul was always on the radio. People told me I looked like you in that video with the girl with a guitar singing in the bathroom.

 

 

Jewel in the video for Who Will Save Your Soul

 

me in 1997

Your voice caught my attention, and your story intrigued me.  Like you, I had lived in my car before. I knew what it was like to be broke.  I knew what it was like to struggle.  I listened to your first album over and over and sang along to every track. I knew all the words by heart.  Who Will Save Your Soul made me think about how we choose to live our daily lives.  Pieces of You pointed out interesting parts of human nature.  You Were Meant For Me was simple yet expressed the pain of heartbreak. 

Previously a granola-type person who didn't shave or wear makeup, I started getting my hair highlighted, wearing makeup, and shopping for a professional wardrobe as I struggled to make ends meet as a single mother.  As I learned to enhance my natural beauty, people kept telling me I looked so much like you.  Being compared to you is a high compliment!  I remember crashing the 1996 MTV Pre-Inaugural Ball in Washington, DC with a girlfriend, and reporters kept asking me if I was Jewel. 

Spirit came out on CD, and I moved to Reno, NV in 1998.  Down So Long, What's Simple is True, Deep Water, and Hands were instant favorites. Again, I loved to sing along with every song.  I'd moved to Reno with a guy, and a few months later, it fell apart (long story).  I met my husband there in 1998 and worked as a teacher for three years supporting my daughter.  We were best friends, and then he stepped up to the plate and asked me to marry him. Shortly thereafter, we got married and had a little girl together in 2000.  Your music inspired me to listen to my heart.  What's simple is true - those words are very true.

In 2001, we moved back to VA so my husband could attend law school.  9/11 happened, and your song, Hands, became one of the songs being played to inspire people.  This Way was released.  Jesus Loves Me, Break Me, This Way, and Standing Still  were my favorites.

From that point on, things in my life have been on an upward trajectory.  As you and your music continued to evolve, I've always been inspired to be "the kind of woman I'd want my daughters to be."  In 2010, I wrote this blog entry and ended it with lyrics from your song, You Are What You Are. 

I play guitar, and I love playing your songs.  I've seen you performing live many times including at Wolf Trap in Vienna, VA, S.Lake Tahoe,CA, and Bass Performance Hall in Ft Worth, TX. Your poetry and song lyrics continue to enrich my life and inspire me to be gentle with myself, to find beauty in the world all around me, and to follow my intuition for it will surely lead me in the right direction.  My deepest gratitude for you and your music.  Thank you Jewel!

Sincerely,
Susanne Nelson

My kind of heroine

I am the proud mom of two daughters. One is out of the nest and in college, and the other is a tweenager.  I've been both a working mom and a stay home mom, so I have lived on both sides of the fence.  Raising girls in today's world is a challenging and fulfilling craft.  I learn something new all the time from my experiences with my daughters and want the best for them in their adult lives.  I want them to feel loved and nurtured, yet I also want them to know what challenge and struggle feel like so they can know the sense of pride and accomplishment that comes with facing adversity and rising up out of figurative ashes.  When it's their turn to be mothers, I want them to have happy memories of their childhoods and a strong sense of themselves so they can shine as individuals as well as give their utmost love and devotion to their families.  There is no "handbook" for raising daughters, but I love this list of rules for mothers with daughters:  It actually brought tears to my eyes as I read it.

http://diapersdaisies.blogspot.com/2012/01/rules-for-mothers-of-daughters.html

Today, I braided my ponytail since it's in style, and I couldn't help but think of Katniss, the heroine from the latest movie and book craze, the Hunger Games.  Her character is introduced as a hunter in the woods in a post apocolyptic world.  She is from a coal mining district, wears modest clothing, and sports braids in many scenes throughout the movie.  To me the braids make her seem stronger, perhaps it's the idea of weaving three sections of hair together to make a stronger mane.  Three is the magic number, the holy trinity, faith hope and charity, tripods stand strong, tricycles are sturdy.  I braided my hair and thought of the qualities of a strong woman.  In today's society where technology is ubiquitous, girls have so many heroines in the media.  When I was a little girl, we only had one tv in the house, and classic princess stories and Barbies were my main female role models.  I've seen heroines change over the years and have been happy to see the emergence of strong, confident, smart female roles. 

Katniss from the Hunger Games is the most contemporary heroine I admire.  She volunteers to take her little sister's place in a fight to the death even though she is scared for her own life.  She is smart, humble, and true to herself.  She doesn't get involved with the initial bloodbath.  She takes her mentor's advice and finds high ground and seeks water. She uses her intelligence to outwit her competitors and plays to her strength, which is shooting with a bow and arrow.  Ironically, it's her willingness to risk the ultimate sacrifice and stand up to the rules of the game that changes the ending of the story.  She shows solidarity with the final competitor and saves his life.   She is strong and beautiful and smart, trifecta!

Hermione Granger is my next favorite heroine.  She is also one smart cookie.  Her character in the Harry Potter series is frequently studying and always knows the answers, both in class and to help solve whatever problem they find themselves facing.  She shows that education pays off and that knowledge is power.  She also shows that young ladies can be intelligent and beautiful and that it is possible for a boy and a girl to have a quality friendship.  She is daring and confident and keeps her cool in the most precarious situations. 

Disney started branching away from the stereotypical princess-waiting-for-a-prince theme first with Pocahontas and then with Mulan.  Both heroines struggle with family honor and loyalty. Both heroines risk their lives to be true to themselves.  Both heroines trust their intuition even when it's a different path than what is expected of them.  The Disney version of Pocahontas wasn't historically correct, but it adopted the story of saving her man's life (John Smith in the movie, John Rolfe in history).  Her father was the chief and John was captured and was going to be killed, so she put herself in between John.  She was one of the original activists, and I'm proud to note that my great grandmother was a geneologist and traced our family tree, finding that we are descendents of her only son Thomas Rolfe.  She shows us that we should take a stand for what we know is right.  She also shows us a deep connection with nature.  Mulan doesn't want her father to go off to war, so she pretends she is a boy and becomes a soldier to bring honor to her family.  She shows how to be respectful and loyal to your family.  She shows how to be brave, take risks, and to face her fears.  She shows how sometimes, it's important to put the welfare of others above that of your own.

Cut to some of my least favorites, Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty.  Cinderella goes from an unhappy, overworked, girl of little means to a lavish lifestyle as a princess.  Why? Is it because she went to school and worked hard to earn all of her possessions?  Was it because she made goals and took steps to reach them? No, it was because she snuck out, went to a ball, and caught the eye of Prince Charming.  He fits the lost shoe on her foot and presto, he wisks her off her feet into happily ever after land.  Sleeping Beauty and Snow White are pretty much the same story, minus the ball and the glass slipper.  They are both put under spells by evil characters and lay in repose for eternity until kissed by Prince Charming.  The magic kiss brings her back to consciousness and they ride off into the sunset to live happily ever after.  However, no kiss, no man, no happily ever after.  They are basically dead without a man.  What kind of lesson does that teach our daughters?

Speaking of dead without a man, Bella Swan from the Twilight series.  She is the most do-nothing heroine I have ever met.  She seriously does nothing other than fantasize and hallucinate about Edward and stare out the window in a deep depression when he leaves her.  Her whole life is wrapped up in a dead, cold vampire.  Very much alive Jacob is her best friend and is the opposite of Edward. He is in her life day to day. Edward leaves her broken hearted.  He's a werewolf, and naturally there is a rivalry between the boys for Bella's affections.  She is too lost in Edward to see the value of what is right in front of her, and she eschews Jacob in pursuit of becoming a vampire wife and mom.  She zones out at school and in life and in the end, she gives up her life for a male character.  Her life is worth nothing without a boy. That's not the lesson I want to teach my girls. 

Don't let life happen to you

Grab the buffalo by the horns

Ride the crest of the wave

Some of my favorite male celebrities

Brandon Boyd of Incubus

Brandon Boyd

Anthony Kiedis

Anthony Kiedis of Red Hot Chili Peppers

Green Day

Justin Timberlake

Michael Stipe of REM

Lil Wayne

Eminem

Lil Wayne and Drake

Marky Mark Wahlberg

LeBron James

Adrian Peterson of MN Vikings

Brad Pitt

Mark Wahlberg

Nick Hexum of 311

Justin Bieber?

Really? Best Artist of the Year?

It's bad enough to be one of his female co-nominees, powerhouses like Lady Gaga, but I feel especially bad for Eminem. He was representing the rest of the males in the category.  To lose to Justin Bieber....well, I'm not a male, so I'm  just speculating, but let's just say that I think Eminem needs a big hug right about now.  He's got my vote!

Mariah Carey Ft. Jay-Z, Akon & Lil Wayne - Bye Bye (Threemix)

TODAY'S GUITAR LESSON
I love this song, especially this remix! Figured out the chords and key, working on improvisation.